Hillcrest: The Hillpress

Starting in 2005, the RAs in Hillcrest published a rather comical monthly newsletter. The following year, the newsletter recieved a boost and some legitimacy by becoming an official class - an Honors Reading Group, to be precise. Hillpress now has over twice as many staffers, giving us an excuse to publish it weekly.

It was thought that the first year of issues had been lost to posterity, however, a recent donation by an anonomous Hillpress collector has completed our collection. Therefore, we can now present every single article ever featured in Hillpress in as PDFs.

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Spring 2009

5.04.09: Motivational Speaker Visits VT, Bike Ride... Naked?, Final Exam Horoscopes, Editorial: The Road Goes Ever On and On
4.27.09: Student Discovers Perpetual Motion Equation, The Voice that Launched a Thousand TV Networks, Broadening Our Horizons, 5 Great Move-Out Ideas
4.20.09: Hillpress Chooses New Editor, Neglected Holidays Unite, Torture Tantrum, Who's Honoring Me Now?
4.13.09: Tax Day, Funny Names on Decline in Britain, Virginia Tech Dedicates Newly Renovated Cow, Bicep Watch: Michelle Obama
3.30.09: April 1: Not Just for Fools Anymore, Jamestown to Have Lackluster Celebration, UVA Blues, Bernie Madoff: You Silly, Silly Man
3.20.09: EARLY PRE-FRESHMAN INTERVIEW WEEKEND EDITION!; What to Expect When You're Expecting (to Go to College), Beamer Buys Swaziland, Freshman Descend Upon Us Once Again
3.16.09: Hillcrest Gets a House Call, FCC Identifies New Expletive, VT Research Update, Letter FROM the Editor
3.02.09: CLAHS Adds 5w337 New Major, A Closer Look at Hillcrest, Hillcrest Room Selection Quiz
2.23.09: Steger Announces Budget Reallocations, Substance Abuse Averages Down at VT, Cartoon: The New Adventures of Justin and Dustin, Dear FOTD Commish...
2.16.09: Clone High, There's No Stein!, Ooctuplets' Mother Criticized, Life After Graduation!
2.09.09: Hillcrest Opts for Redshirting Freshmen, Apple Explores New Frontiers, Supremely Courted by Barack Obama, Evolution: The Missing Link?
2.02.09: Hillcrest Opts for Redshirting Freshmen, Obama Updates Middle East Policy, First Clockwise Circumnavigation of the Drillfield, Join the Staff!
1.27.09: Breaking News: Community Artifact Missing, Global Warming: Not So Warm After All?, Cheney Comes in for a Tune-Up, School Has Started!

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Fall 2008

12.10.08: More Obama Cabinet Picks Announced, Bad Movies, Economic Crisis Gift Guide (Parent Edition), Tips for Surviving Finals
12.03.08: Fight of the Day: The Return-ament!, New Bailout Plan, LHC Destroys Universe, Pwnage: A Brief History
11.19.08: Homeless Population Resents Obama, NerdFest '08 Wrapup, Lolcrestacians, Hillpress Classic: Don't Be a Turkey
11.12.08: Campus Health Alert, Fashion Trends, Guest Article: THE DARK LORD HAS RISEN, Editorial: Sarah Palin Thrown Under Bus
11.04.08: LEAKED ELECTION EDITIONS!; 11.05.08 - Obama Wins!; Obama Declares "New Day," Obama Offers Palin Homeland Security Post, Brief History of Obama, Countries Other than America: Still in Existence?; 11.05.08 - McCain Wins!; McCain Wins!, Obama Proven Responsible for Flex Scandal, President-Elect McCain Fit to Serve, Where are they now: Barack Obama
10.29.08: Flex Dollars: Not Flexible, Obama 2012 Leaks, Older Than Obama ~ Younger Than McCain, Popsicle Freshmen
10.22.08: Ghost Hunters, Spotlight on: Will Hutcheson, New Strategy for Football
10.15.08: Local Artist(s?) Get(s?) Creative(??), Hillcrest Boroughs, Sarah Palin Reads Hillpress!, Lucas Apologizes
10.08.08: Dinner Committee Enforcement, Music Review: Coldplay, ACC: WTF?, Cryptoquip Contest
10.01.08: Scandal at NerdFest, College of Science Drops Teaching, $700,000,000,000, No More Bicycles
9.24.08: Freshman Draft, Paying for Study Abroad, Top 6: Things that Could Cause Wall St. to Crash, Rock Band 2: 2 Good 4 Regular Guitar
9.17.08: Alternative Transportation, "lol" Added to Dictionary, Taylor Wins "One for the Gipper", HC v. MC Frisbee
9.10.08: Introducing D3, Green Party!, Spotlight on: Diana Cole, Anti-Helmet Group
9.03.08: VT Enters Space Race, Loliticians, Hurricane Naming, Opinions: Female VP?
8.29.08: Bonus Classes, Weather Forecast, Limericks, Cooking up Consipracy
8.22.08: MOVE-IN EDITION!; Hillcrest Campaigning, The ElectOlympics, Mitch's Olympic Aspirations, Georgia vs. Georgia, SPORTS!, The Graduate's Corner, Consumer Alert, ¡¡¡Actual News!!!, Meet the Hillpress

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Spring 2008

4.25.08: Top 9: Things That Were Different Back When Jack Dudley Started as Honors Director, One-Upmanship, The Write Stuff
4.18.08: Brad's Choice Awards, Spotlight on: the New Mattresses, Apocalypse Soon, Investigative Report into Childhood
4.11.08: Bowling for Change, Olympic Security, Gender Discrimination through Language, VT Crossword
4.04.08: Congressional Baseball, PFSD, Top 4: Pyschological Disorders, Community Facebook Applications
3.28.08: EXTENDED (BELATED) FRESHMAN INTERVIEW WEEKEND EDITION!; Guest CT Article, Bear Stearns, Mitch's p00p, Beamer One-Ups Greenberg, On the Existence of Economics, Quoteboard Criticism, PS Gang Spotted on Campus
3.14.08: You Don't Know Jackstein, Nation: Four Marines Not Killed in Iraq this Week, Top 6: Video Games of 2008, HC Sends Musicians to MC
2.29.08: Castro Resigns, "Bamana" Visit, Quoteboard Candidacy, Hillcrest Additions
2.15.08: Report: Laughter Not Actually Best Medicine, Friction Speaks Out, Ask Matt, Valentine's Day History
2.08.08: SPECIAL SUPER TUESDAY EDITION!; Catch the Flip-Flop Bug, Hillpublican Primary, Top 8: Things David Will Change as President, THIS IS OPRAH!, Mike Huckabee: the New Honors Director, Ron Paul Appoints Hillcrustaceans to Cabinet
2.01.08: Remembering Nicole, Superman v. Super Bowl, Nation: State of the Union
1.25.08: New Staffers, Guitar Hero v. Rock Band, SPOILER ALERT!, Editorial: We Need a Board for Community Standards

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Fall 2007

11.30.07: Email Typo Causes Sketchy Situation, Putting the FUN in Finelli, New Major at VT, Classic Hillpress: Your Petulant ex-RA
11.16.07: A Very Hillcrest Thanksgiving, The Great War is Over, Resident Wins Fields Medal, Spotlight on: Card Readers
11.09.07: Sports: Uniform Change for FSU Game, Atlantis in Blacksburg?, Bush Declares North Dakota a "Rogue State"
11.02.07: Campus Mail Overhaul, Candy, Old Hokies all Around, Sports: Glennon's Wide Influence
10.26.07: Sports: Hillcrest v. Notre Dame, New BT Bus Route, Top 6 Surplus Auction Items, Guest Column: You + D2 = Cancer
10.19.07: Going Postal, When Your Parents Visit, If I Were in Charge of Dining Services
10.12.07: VT Announces New Vacation Schedule, Tips for the Mid-NerdFest Dance, Dating Advice
10.05.07: Ron Paul Campaign Endorsements, Lexicography Lesson, Top 6 Unlikely Coffeehouse Acts, Hot Water Under Attack
9.28.07: Too Many Davids, Spotlight on: Cas Craven, Out With the Old, In With the Less old
9.21.07: Sticking Up for Decency, 'Roids Scandal, New Sophomore Scholarship
9.14.07: Budget Cuts Target Campus Dining, Oh Gnome, Dave Matthews' Top 6 Alternative Tributes, Captain Planet: Remembered
9.07.07: Campus Mail Exposé, Missing Quote Board, Tour of the Grove
8.31.07: Fight of the Day Bracketology, Guitar Hero Obsession, Crackpot on the Loose
8.15.07: SPECIAL MOVE-IN EDITION!; Three times as long: Carey Selected to be Secretary of the Price, Picking a Floor 101, Top 6 Unorthodox Ways to Move into Hillcrest, A Topographical Survey of Hillcrest, Brad's 8 Most Important Things I Learned in China, Solving Separation Anexity in 3 Steps, An Epidemic of Epidemic Proportions, Can Y'all Handle It?: A Language Primer

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Spring 2007

4.27.07: Top 6 Dumbest Hall Sports, Tips for Check Out, Popular Summer Vacation Plans, Editorial: I Need a Job
4.13.07: BATTLE OF THE STARS!
4.06.07: Cavalier Counter-Terrorism, Hillcrest Breeding Groups, Jew of the Year, Top 6: Things to Do in Blacksburg for Under 75 Cents
3.30.07: Holey Moley, Summer Plans, Student Recycling
3.23.07: Silly Walks with Dean Jeremy, Out of Control Academia, Expand Spring Break, Opinion: "But I'm Tired of Supporting the Troops!"
3.16.07: Spotlight of the Week: Bill's Chair, Top 8 D2 Special Meals that Bombed, Mid-NerdFest Dance Advice, Surviving the Hallway of No Return
2.23.07: Arm Slusher Tower!, Seasonal Dung Deprivation Syndrome, Warm Weather: Will it Last?
2.16.07: Night at the Movies with Jeremy Ebert, The Inaugural Hillpress Hillcrest Pi Chart and News Analysis, The Laundry on the Edge of Forever
2.09.07: Addicted to Dropping, Put on a Shirt, Ways to Stay Warm, Ladies: Mitch is Single Again
2.02.07: Freshmen for Sale, Black: It's the New Black, Beware: Main Campbellians
1.26.07: This is NOT Kosher with Rabbi Jeremy, How to Raise $1,000,000 in 30 Days, Main Campbell: Responsible for Trashing Our Kitchen, Welcome Back from the Editor

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Fall 2006

12.01.06: Gifts that are Better to Give than Receive, The Twelve Days 'Till Finals, How to Tackle 6 Assignments 6 Days from Reading Day, A Brief Glimpse of the Post-Apocalyptic World - Hillcrest Hall Over Break
11.17.06: Stop Complaining with Dr. Jeremy Papillon, Happy Turkey Murder Day!, Local Ghosts Love To Get Down, Bush: Not a Girly Man
11.10.06: Prank Calling Schiffert Health Center, Thank God for Standardized Tests, Majors Worth Switching To, Election Special
11.03.06: Peterazzi: Elvis Sighting, It's Not Christmas Yet, Take Me Out to the Ballgame with Coach Jeremy, America's Biggest Threat: Gay Marriage
10.27.06: Ranting Ryan: Jobs and Excuses, Secret Aerospace Developments, Need to Catch a Bus?, Hillcrest Calendar
10.20.06: Spotlight on Collin Calhoun, Cloudy... With a Chance of Meatballs, Vote or Die with Senator Jeremy
10.13.06: When Zombies Attack, Death: The Silent Killer, Letters to the Editor: What About Owensday; Shultz Actually Doesn't Suck
10.06.06: Spotlight on Chris Midgley, He Said/He Said: Whose Cuisine Reigns Supreme?
9.29.06: Spotlight on Mitch Daniels, Get Back to Work Researchers, Can you Taste the Fruit?
9.22.06: Ask Professor Jeremy, World News Update, Regarding Old People, Open Letter to Dr. Kriz
9.15.06: Alternate Honors Degrees, Spotlight on Sam Abboud, Outsider's Guide to Hillcrest, Talk Like a Pirate Day
9.08.06: Focus on Health with Dr. Jeremy, Spolight on Dylan Greenwood, Parking DisServices

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Classic Hillpress: 2005-2006

March 2006: Spring Break Reports, How to Kill an Entire Day Watching TV
February 2006: Spotlight on: Katie R., What's Going on in February?
January 2006: MLK: The Rest of the Story, Spotlight on: Brad
November 2005: Spotlight on: Susan, Your Petulant RA, PIRATES!!!
October 2005: Spotlight on: Geoff, Ask Your Caustic RA, Sanda's Recipe Series: Pudding Thing!, Policies You Need to Know
September 2005: MacGyver Time Change, Spotlight on: The Boss Lady, WAR LOOMS!

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